Friday, December 5, 2014

Creating opportunities*



Iris is 14 months old now and even though she is still so very dependent on me - I find myself thinking about the future. The newborn-free future. I have been pregnant and/or breastfeeding for the past 5 years. My body has changed, my lifestyle has shifted, my relationship with Rodge has morphed and most of all, I feel like my mind has gone just a little bit mushy. Anyone who says that you can go on as you were after having kids, well it certainly didn't work like that for me.

Some people fall pregnant and have babies and become super organised. Me, I've just relaxed into a constant foggy state and let everything crumble around us.

After Oscar was born, the small print and publishing company I worked for went bankrupt. I never returned to fulltime work. When he was about 7 months old I did a little bit of freelancing, but after I fell pregnant with Nora, I found I couldn't cope with pregnancy, a very active toddler and work - and was happy when my freelance work dried up.

Now after 4ish years of intense baby and toddler time, I feel like I need to do something for me. Photographing the wedding and the joy that gave me, confirmed that. This is were I find myself a little stuck. So I'm looking for and trying to create all the opportunities possible. Only Oscar goes to preschool, so it isn't like I have swathes of free time, but I do have snippets of time - and I'm looking for things I can do, with my babes around.

As a consequence I approached Betty (a good friend and graphic designer who I've mentioned here), and begged her to let me take photos for one of her clients, the beautiful linen company, Miss Molly. Betty was reluctant, she likes to pay creatives and photographers wasn't in Miss Molly's current budget, but she relented. I borrowed heavy bags full of exquisite sheets and fabrics. And I'm ever so glad I did. Some of my photos are already up on Miss Molly's website, and more photos have been requested, which makes me rather happy. She has offered me gifts of linen in return.

Now where to next?

*This post could have had so many possible titles - 'The past five years', 'Miss Molly', 'Contemplating the future' ...

3 comments:

  1. I'm so happy for you! I'm in a similar mindset but not nearly as resolved as to what to do about it...you have truly inspired me.

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    1. I don't feel very resolved (ha, funny how this blog can make me look more organised than I am!) But I know I have to start putting myself out there and grabbing whatever opportunities I can, which I find totally daunting. Sending you luck Heidi - look forward to seeing whichever direction you head in x

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  2. Go you! half of it is just putting it out there. it is an interesting place to be; the place of a mother who is looking for a change of before children work option, perhaps not a career as such but something to earn a bit of cash, whilst still fitting into the ever important life of a mother and something that is possibly nourishing. It is an interesting time (especially with brains that aren't quite what they used to be), hopefully you will enjoy the process, big love to you xxx jay

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